While everyone over in London is waiting for the Royal Belly to burst, here in NYC we’re waiting for another type of bubble to pop: that of a crazy heatwave. Signs are looking good for it to abate 10-degrees or so by next week:
Now, I’m a summer baby (Aug. 25, holla!) and I love me some hot, hot, heat, but it’s been pretty dreadful. Like, sweating-in-places-not-suitable-for-this-audience dreadful. In fact, it’s so hot that the New York Times dispatched a writer to try and fry an egg on the sidewalk a few weeks ago. Too bad they used a frying pan. (Isn’t the whole point to do it on the actual concrete?!)
Want further proof of all this hotness?
I’ve seriously contemplated checking into Equinox just to swank one of their cold, eucalyptus-soaked towels.
I actually chose to sit in 2-inches of water with several diaper-clad kiddies playing in a park’s sprinkler-filled “Water Lab.”
I knowingly put back on the wet denim shorts (from my sitting in said 2-inches of water) to keep me cool later that evening.
I sleep, shades drawn, blasting the A/C and two fans. (I’m terrified of my ConEd bill for July and am considering unplugging all electronics.)
I look for ugly, dicey scaffolding to walk under.
That breeze the subway blows when coming in from the dirty, rat-infested tunnel actually feels quite good.
The ridiculously delicious “Salted Crack Caramel” ice cream from Ample Mills that I got at Brooklyn Bridge Park yesterday turned to “Salted Liquid Crack Caramel” before I could finish three spoonfuls.
The best party gift at my best friend Jen’s henna on Thursday was not her soon-to-be mother-in-law’s absolutely delicious, gooey- honey Moroccan pastries and evil-eye bracelets, but the standing fans they brought in to make up for the LACK OF AIR CONDITIONING. Score!
All this considered, I will not, under any circumstances, be one of those people who use an umbrella for shade.
I may have taken my first intentionally cold shower since my Bali days back in 2000, but as John Denver once sang: Sunshine on my shoulders makes me happy. Sweaty, but happy.